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No Good Deed Goes Unpunished!

20 Jan

I have heard this saying many times, but i have also seen that it is true. I am a fairly generous person with people I appreciate and love. I also feel sometimes people don’t appreciate the nice things i do…and it makes me feel like a fool and like i don;t ever want to help anyone out again!

2 years ago, a nursing friend of mine fell on hard times. She had been injured and out of work for three months. She did not have any disability insurance so, no income for three months. When she started back to work, a nurse that was hired to fill her spot wanted her job and lied and got her fired. I knew my friend was innocent, and she was later exonerated of all charges.

Because she was out of work she got behind on rent and car payments, car was taken by bank. Landlord evicted her. My church helped put her up in a hotel, I kept her things in my 2-car garage with the understanding that as soon as she got a new place, she would get it out.
I also gave her my old van so she could get back and forth to work.
She conveniently kept missing opportunities to sign the van paper work over to herself. I had to keep paying insurance until she did so.

well, she moved into a new place about 3 months later…

2 years later – still have her crap in my garage and just stopped paying insurance on the van, NOT because she finally signed the title but because she left it parked somewhere when it broke down…and it was towed for abandonment. I just sent her a 30 day notice registered letter about her stuff in my garage.

I am a tad miffed, feel I have been fully used and wonder if I would ever offer the same to anyone again.


Teaching young girls at Church

25 Apr

I was wrangled at my church to help with a young girls day in a couple of weeks. I was asked to speak at this event they call “Beautiful,” which will start with a ladies breakfast and switches to a young ladies lunch. My own daughters do not want to attend. 

So I accepted the task. I didn’t really have anything else going on since, at that time my job search was not getting much activity (happy to say I have a job – but it doesn’t start for another week and a half). But, I have only been a born-again Christian for 10 years, I left religion when I graduated high school – am I really qualified to teach young women? 

I do have three daughters, one in college and two in high school.  None of them have gotten pregnant, They really don’t date,  they do okay in school, they don’t do drugs or drink (as far as I can tell). They rarely go out except at church events or school events. I guess my girls are pretty good kids, but I think it is in-spite of me. Does that qualify me to teach in church? I sort of feel like a hippocrite though because I occasionally cuss, watch rated R movies, and sort of linger over the musculature of topless men. I don’t think appreciating youthful beauty is lust, is it? 

So, I know none of us perfect. I also know, many of the young girls seem to like me (they call me mom and hug me). I can’t say I have gone out of my way to get to know them, but I think they find me funny (I look funny at least). I certainly don’t act like most adults at the church. I wear jeans, dance and sing songs they know (I had to listen to One Direction for 13 hours on a thanksgiving trip to see family, you learn the words of the songs). Also, I am fairly easy going compared to other adults at the church. So, I guess that might qualify me for this job – but the responsibility!

Anyway,  I am going to give it a try. I hope they will find it informative. My assigned title is “Whose Label do you Wear?” Just Prior will be a reading about “You don’t need a Man.”  Basically, I want them to know about dressing modestly, attracting quality not quantity. A guy needs to get to know the most beautiful part of you – your inner beauty! So, if you have a suggestion let me know or you can just pray I say the right words.






19 Apr

Let me first remind the reader that I am a Christian. I am also a woman, scientist, and a nurse. I believe in God and I believe that the 10 commandments are a very basic set of rules all human beings should use for guidance in what is right and wrong, one of which mentions that we are not to kill.   I have several friends who have had admitted to having abortions. They are still my friends, I still love them and don’t treat them differently. They are aware that I am both pro choice and pro life – let me explain.

I strongly believe God wants us to be free to make choices. This is a theme present over and over in the bible.                        1 Corinthians 10:23  says 23 “Everything is permissible”–but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible”–but not everything is constructive.

God allows us to make the choices, it is up to us to make the right choices. He tries to teach us his desire for us in the bible and through our conscience/intuition (holy spirit) where  he speaks to us. We are ultimately the ones who have to live with the consequences of our choices.

In this line of thinking, lets examine the choices of abortion:

We all know what causes pregnancy. The first choice one makes is to have intercourse or not.. The sex drive is very strong and sometimes overwhelming if we let our passions go.

If we do not want children right now, we have another choice, which is a form of birth control. There are some methods of birth control you need to plan for in advance and some that can be used in a rush. Since some methods are less effective than others,  sometimes doubling-up (using the birth control pill and condom, for example) can protect you from risk of pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.

Ok, so  worst case scenario – you had a little too much to drink last night (another choice) and hooked up with a guy at a college party (whats his name?) and the condom broke and you were on no other birth control method.  OMG!!!  Now what!?

You could go to the drug store to get the morning after pill or wait it out and hope the “crimson tide” makes her monthly visit. If not, yet another choice/decision may have to be made.

At this point, I say 2 wrongs don’t make a right. You chose to have intercourse before being ready to have children, chose to not use adequate birth control, and now you want the right to kill what you created with your choices and poor planning.

In this case, I feel abortion is a selfish choice. Many consider it the “easy way out” for person lacking self-control and maturity. But, one never knows the long term psychological damage this choice has on the abortive Mom.  When she has her “wanted” children one day, she will always think about the one she aborted and what if they find out they had an older brother or sister you killed?  When the date of the abortion comes up in her mind, she will think that her baby would have been 8 about now, and look at other 8 year olds wondering what her baby might have been like.  Even Moms who put their babies up for adoption think the same things, but at least they know the baby has a good home and is alive, and they might have the option of seeing them one day if they are open to it.

In the case of rape/incest, I understand the choice to want to abort a baby from rape and I think God does too. But, it truly is not the baby’s fault.  It may not be what God had planned, but God will bless the right choices. What mankind screws up, God can turn it to his glory.  Keep praying and listen to your heart.

I am not the judge of what is right or wrong. My only desire is to educate about what the bible says about such things. As a nurse, I am glad we have a relatively safe way for women to have control over their reproductive organs. But really the choices that really matter happen before you get pregnant! Ultimately, you have the choice and I hope you choose life.

Talent for Ideas

18 Apr

A fellow blogger,, stated “Talent is like faith.”  I agree!

Before I actually sat down and read the bible from start to finish, I saw several things happen in my life that led me to believe there is a higher force at work in the world. You see, I fancy myself a bit of an idea person. I have been told by numerous people that I have great ideas and should follow through on them. I have often thought the best kind of job for me would be to get paid for my ideas. But I noticed that “my” ideas were not really mine at all. It seems great minds think alike 🙂

Case in point: Years ago I worked for a Garden Center/ Landscaping company called  the Botany Center in Knoxville, TN.  I worked in the Garden Center and my boss and I were cleaning shelves and getting ready to put out our spring merchandise, an exciting time for that kind of business!  While cleaning, I came across a shelf with several large dusty Terrarium jars, which obviously had not sold in a long while.  In a flash of brilliance, I decided to fill the jar with water,  get a water-loving plant (Peace lily), clean off the roots, and put it in the jar with a fish in it. All the terrarium jars sold when we put out this display!

Imagine my surprise when I start seeing my idea everywhere a few years later…

betapeacelilyThere is a passage in the bible in Matthew 13 called the Parable of the Sower:

 “A farmer went out to sow his seedAs he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants. Still other seed fell on good soil, where it produced a crop—a hundred,sixty or thirty times what was sown.

I think ideas are like seeds.  God sprinkles ideas into the world. Those who listen to naysayers and never develop ideas,  let them get eaten up and forgotten in the day-to-day grind.  Some people know the ideas are great, and start to develop them, but do not have the money, persistence, or the talent to promote them and grow them, and they die. Those that have the talents to develop them (good soil) can make the money (crop).

I believe this as I have seen several times in my personal life where many people had the same ideas at the same time – and they didn’t know each other. They just recognized a need and sought to fill the need.

I spent some time in Lexington, KY and there were three pet stores that opened up within 2 months and within 10 miles of each other (yes, one of the owners was me and my then boyfriend, now ex-husband). They did not all last, as location made a huge difference in their success. But,  it was an interesting coincidence don’t you think?

In King of Prussia, PA, I remember commenting to my (now-ex) husband that there were no movie theaters in the area and wouldn’t it be nice to open one up. In 5-10 years, five mega-movie theaters (King of Prussia, Oaks, Plymouth Meeting, Exton, and Collegeville) opened up within 15 miles of King of Prussia!  Another coincidence?

So, I think God gives some of us those flashes of brilliance. I am praying that the jobs and education I have / had are developing my abilities so that when the next idea comes my way, I have the ability, time,  and means to make it grow into something fruitful. I need something to do in my retirement years!

Randomly Yours!

Life failure

17 Apr

In the last 6 months, I have lost 3 jobs. There, I said it!

Does this make me a loser?  I don’t think it does,  but I feel like it sometimes. I know I am not a loser because I put myself through nursing school, maintaining a 3,95 GPA, while working a part-time job and being a single parent with three children! I have  excellent credit, own my own home, and my kids are pretty good. I have blown through my savings, but that is why I save in the first place! I think in some ways this was a blessing, giving me some time off to think about stuff and start this blog!

(skip this section if you don’t care to read what happened)

I was with one company for 2 and a half years. They hired my new boss, who I soon felt a visceral repulsion towards. Behind closed doors, she was arrogant and condescending. When someone who mattered was around, she was all happy and sing-song-y (aka fake)!  She and I were a bit like oil and water. She did not like me at all either! It was my job to orient her to the facility, to which she brushed me off (because she already knew everything there was to know) and was “too busy” to get a tour or do this or that no matter how many times I tried – she was too busy. Two months later. there was an emergency with a patient, and she did not know where to find the emergency supplies. Of course, she blamed me. Easy to assign blame on others, but honestly, shouldn’t a person of her (self admitted) high stature and knowledge have considered that it might be good to orient herself on something very basic!  But it was my job – I should have insisted she get the orientation  and have her sign off on the paperwork. No matter, I disliked the job before she came and her arrival made be dislike it even more and I was looking at other options.

Fortunately I got another job right away (more $$ and less commute!). This was with a great company. They were looking for someone with a strong customer service background. I was very honest in the interview (I had a job at that time) and almost tried to talk them out of me. You see I had only been a nurse for 4 years, and most of my actual nursing skills were on night shift, when I was promoted to staff educator. I told them this. They liked me and didn’t seem to care. All was going well, I thought, until they called me in the office (2 days before my 3 month probationary period) and said it was not working out. They didn’t give me any concrete reasons, just it wasn’t working out the way they had hoped. I was shocked and sad. I loved that place!  However, some information has come to light since then (from an inside source) that led me to believe they hired me to buy time until the one they really wanted could take the job. Sucks for me!

The last job loss was my fault – I admit it!  I am a hard worker and a team player. I offered to work a night shift since we had no nursing staff to cover and needed someone. I had already worked 50 hours that week. I took the Friday day off to try to sleep all day in preparation for working Friday night. I didn’t get much sleep, which was only part of the problem. I did everything right except let the director of nursing know that next morning about an incident. I put the report in her mailbox – forgetting it was Saturday morning and she wouldn’t be back till Monday.  When Monday came she found the report and was very upset she was not told about it sooner. What can I say – I am human, I made a mistake. I also was out of a job again 😦

So, I am supposed to start a new job next week in an area that is very different from what I have done before. I hope they keep me for a while. I cannot believe the flaming hoops I have to jump through to get this job!  Credit check, background check, Drug check, W-2s for the last 7 years!! I am wondering if I will even get to start the job at this point! It’s crazy!

I think I learned that I am burnt out working in nursing administration for a salary. I want to work hourly, get the overtime pay when I work extra hours, and be able to turn off the phone/job when I am home. I want to enjoy the little bit of time I have with my kids before they go to college. I want to have time to work in my yard, write, exercise and work on a business plan. Maybe, I will have time for an actual date or better yet – a relationship! I have enjoyed my time off – even though I am broke and am looking forward to getting back to work and being able to pay my bills.  In my age bracket, I don’t think any of us believe we will actually be able to retire. I might as well enjoy the short-lived forced retirement I have been given!

Randomly Yours!

The Musings of a Random Thinker

25 Mar

In everyday situations, I rarely share where I stand on controversial subjects. If I did, I would not have the relationships I have today. I value my friends more than the need to tell them my opinion. It’s not that I don’t think they can handle my opinion and they would not want to be friends with me. It is more about these being my personal feelings / thoughts and not something I am interested in changing via a discussion or argument with anyone. I do not learn in a confrontation and I avoid it whenever possible. I am open to changing my mind about things, but I will not be pressured into it just because someone doesn’t like what I think.

I learn by asking questions and doing research when the subjects come up. My friends know I am not shy about asking questions. I am always wondering why people do the things they do, what is their motivation, and what they feel about the outcome. I have a lot of interests and can talk with people about anything (except computer programming which is a subject area that tends to make my brain fog up and my eyes glaze over).

Anyway, since I like to write and think I have some valid thoughts to share about controversial subjects, I thought I would start here. Image